Monday, May 09, 2005

Mother Nature

I have wanted in this pregnancy, always wanted, to act like some of my more serene girlfriends. S found out she was pregnant again when Jillian was 3 months old- oops! And though her voice cracked when she told me that the nurse congratulated her on how she would be a mom twice in one year, she never missed a beat. She glowed while pregnant with Jason. I never tell her enough what a good mom I think she is.

Tressa was a gorgeous pregnant woman who came to my wedding shower despite almost being arrested at the airport for attempting to conceal a deadly weapon in her luggage, (our gift of a wok,) then danced the night away at our actual wedding and had a baby boy less than two weeks later. My brother Matt told her she was the hottest pregnant woman he had ever seen, and he was right. She lights up a room while describing how she gave birth to Liam in total rockstar fashion, if you are asking me. She is a doula now, and I always think about the lucky women who get to use her services in Florida. I never tell her enough what a good mom I think she is.

Gabi suffered two miscarriages before Sammy came along, and though there were tears and cussing and vague, joking kidnap plans, once she was pregnant with Sammy, there was nothing but calm. She might argue with me about that, but it's my blog, so shushie. I never tell her enough what a good mom she is.

Then there is Claire. Let me tell you about Claire. Claire has babies at home. Claire uses hypnobirthing methods that I hear are pretty awesome and transcendent. Claire uses cloth diapers, works with these folks and just generally loves humankind. Claire is also a savvy entrepreneur. I never tell her enough what a good mom I think she is.

We've SAFELY ESTABLISHED by now that I've struggled to maintain any semblance of grace and composure for the past 22 weeks. I'm tired of beating that drum. I've been lucky, so lucky that the universe has surrounded me with smart women who didn't have any trouble keeping their shit together while pregnant. I should thank my lucky stars- and I do.

But let me tell you something, universe. I am a selfish, mean old bitch. It isn't enough for me to be surrounded by these folks- I need you to keep them safe and happy too. See? Selfish. And while my already loved baby boy may be robbing me of my cool, he has done nothing to my strength. I will KICK YOUR ASS, universe, if you don't LEAVE CLAIRE ALONE RIGHT NOW. Hear me?

Kick. Your. Ass.

I love you, Claire. Get better.

I love the rest of you too. Stay healthy.

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