Spoonfuls of Sugar

I have excellent friends.

I spend a lot of time wondering what it is I must have done in another life to be so lucky in this one when it comes to my buddies.

I usually only scratch the surface here in regards to how I'm feeling. I really try to keep it as light as possible at BG, for a variety of reasons. I save my shameful, ridiculous behavior/thoughts for elsewhere in the world and on the 'net. My college roomies and I have a discussion board that has lately been the target and release point of all of my dysfunction. So, while I touched on the sleep thing, or the lack thereof here, I VERY DRAMATICALLY outlined all the ways I must be failing as a mother there.

(God, my girlfriends are so LUCKY, aren't they? They get my tantrums and my tales of woe! Won the lottery with me, they did.)

I got helpful hints from them on the sleep thing, as well as the usual, wonderful assurances that I'm not crazy, and this too shall pass. The next day though, the next day I got this from Tressa:

So, last night I was coughing up a storm. Every winter I go through an agonizing coughing stint, and here I am in the midst of it. Anyway, I was thinking about you, Kel and it brought back a memory from practically another lifetime.

You were sleeping at our house… I don’t really know why…I don’t think Brendan was there but maybe he was. You were sleeping on our couch at the River Drive apartment- our first apartment after we got married. Anyway, I was in the midst of a coughing fiasco in the middle of the night and I couldn’t sleep, because of the nonstop coughing. I remember you came into my bedroom with a spoon and a bottle of honey, fed me a heaping spoonful, without a sound, and within minutes I was asleep.

That is how I know that you will know and do in fact now know what to do for your son. You mothered me that night in a very calm, confident, loving way. You trusted your instinct and your knowledge. Don’t doubt it now. I don’t.

After I read it I just laid my head down on the desk and cried. And cried and cried. In a good way, though. I mean, she couldn't have said anything nicer or more necessary for me to hear right now than this. I will make it through this first mind-reeling, head-spinning year and even all the years thereafter because of the people that surround me. Without getting TOO maudlin, I just want them all to know that I couldn't do it without them.

That I know I'm lucky.